Attention seeking is attention needing

We all need to feel seen, heard, valued and understood.  Sadly for some of our children this may not always happen on a regular basis at home, resulting in them showing us through their behaviour at school that this is what they need.  The child that we often refer to as an attention seeking is actually attention needing.  We can help the child and make our lives much easier by giving the child some of the attention they badly need through simple strategies.

For example:

  • “I can see you really want some help with that, and I know it’s hard to wait, but I will come over to you after I have finished doing this”
  • “I can see you are finding it really hard to sit still, I’m wondering if it would help if you sat nearer me”
  • “I can see by your face you are disappointed I didn’t choose you to answer but well done for putting your hand up and having a go”

Strategies like this are very effective at helping children to practice self regulation and impulse control by giving them the sense that their needs have been recognised and that they are being seen and heard.



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