Another extract from my book:
When children show us their feelings through their behaviour it is important that we not only try to understand what they may be feeling and trying to communicate to us, but also that we provide them with an emotional vocabulary to help them to talk about their experiences. For example, when a child says they do not want to do something they may be telling us they are scared. How often as adults may we decide we don’t want to do something when the real reason may be that we are scared? It can be useful to respond by saying ” I know you are saying that you don’t want to do that, but sometimes it can feel a bit frightening to try new things.” Although the child may adamantly deny they are experiencing any fear, it is still useful to tentatively introduce the idea that this can sometimes contribute to our resistance.
Try this out in school with children that are showing resistance to trying new things and see what happens.